twenty-three fourteen

brown square with red text, made to look like a music player, text: I want you back, bitter ruin. twentythree fourteen

march was a hard, hard month that culminated in a funeral last week, and that’s all I can say about it. grief is a ravening beast, and when it hits you twice in different ways – one as a long-time ghost and another as a fresh wave – there’s only so much there is to say. it’s overwhelming and yet numbing. a curious, yet utterly horrible cocktail of emotions. and I’ve no choice but swallow it whole.

take out has been a thoroughly sad affair, where I currently live. all good pizza places have closed down and after many a disappointment, I am loath to try another. but as luck would have it, I found a great thai place! utterly too emotionally exhausted to properly cook, this could not have come at a better time. so I was lucky to have some delicious thai food this week. over easter, I sat down with my mum and we had a lovely “mexican bowl” (recipe via hello fresh). just rice, veggies and some melted cheese on top with avocado and a dip, what’s not to love? utterly delicious and very easy to prepare. (and boy were we STUFFED!)

as most days, this week’s music came in a more traditional manner: new release from one of my all time favourite bands! bump of chicken released their single “窓の中から” and … it feels comforting, nostalgic and a little bit bittersweet. I absolutely adore it! not quite new, but something that’s been playing a lot this week was chxrlotte’s hey?“. the lyrics are a perfect fit for how I have been feeling for such a long, long time. and yet there’s the jaunty tune and ukulele sound. feels apt! to round out the music part with something VERY uplifting and nostalgic, I present: yusuke and ohguro maki‘s “tokonatsu“. it makes me wish for a summer at the beach, splashing around and eating sticky ice-cream before it melts!

, genshin and more genshin! mum and I played “together” and caught each other up, that was very nice. (I put together in air quotes, because instead of playing the game together, as we could have done, we sat next to each other while playing. just soothing quality time! I tied up odds and ends, and helped mum to level up nilou, so she’ll use her more.)
I also caught up with some “overdue” quests in sumeru’s desert area, thinking I’d get my hands on baizhu soon… only to have mum casually mention to me that … I AM GOING TO HAVE TO WAIT TILL MAY!! I self-sabotaged a little bit, after that, I fear. in all my anticipation and full of excitement, I absolutely missed that little fact and was sure he’d be mine this week. frustrated, I then pulled for shenhe, who I had been denying myself before since I’d had a surefire baizhu on my hands (pity-pull and over 90 wishes) in a sad twist of fate, I am back to *actually* worrying if I get baizhu!! which kinda blows my mind, I have only been waiting THREE YEARS for the man, ah! but, in frustrated recklessness, after getting my hands on shenhe, I decided I wanted some more mika. “ah, as if I’d pull a 5 star with 30 wishes, no way!”, I thought… well, dear reader, what can I say but … *way*. so, now I have a C2 shenhe (which is neat, she’s so wonderful, and I have a thing for spear wielders), but … I am now empty of wishes and in fear of not getting baizhu because there’s no pity. I’ll have to farm all I can now, do all the quests I can get my hands on and … may even need to throw a bit of money on the game. I just cannot NOT have him! I can’t!!
other than that there’s been taskmaster! a show where british entertainers have to complete quite a few silly tasks to please the well, taskmaster greg davies. the dynamic between the assistant alex horn (and creator of the show) and davies is SO FUN and a big part of the appeal for me. as well, as all the familiar faces from british telly (most of all many faces from my mock the week days, I am very happily nostalgic!) I have laughed out loud a lot and giggled and snorted even more, so this show’s a win!!